Category Archives: Uncategorized

Let it Go! The Glory Days Are Over! And They Weren’t That Glorious To Begin With.

I’m sore. Really sore. I reek of ben gay. I snort Tylenol. Whole. I beg the wife for a massage but my pleading falls on deaf, uncaring ears. I hobble around like a one legged pirate with termites. I take … Continue reading

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An Irrational Fear of Tadpoles

As a wee lad, I was all about catching creatures. Give me an empty peanut butter jar, and by golly I’ll put spiders in there. Bees. Wasps. Lizards. Caterpillars. Ladybugs. If it could fit, it would be caught. And I … Continue reading

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Always the Bad Guy

Ah, I’m home from a long day of working out in the heat. Put on some nice, cool gym shorts and a wife beater, plop down in bed under the fan. About a minute and a half goes by when: … Continue reading

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Anatomy of My Karaoke Fail

I am a PHENOMENAL singer. Seriously. When I’m driving in my car, alone, I’m putting on a show, man. Vocals. Air guitar. Raising the roof. Hip shaking. Elbows out. Body just straight up UNDULATING (hold on, let me see if … Continue reading

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Playing Second Fiddle to Mom

It’s that time of the year again. That time when we put every Mom up on a pedestal and pay homage to them and everything they do for us. Where we go out and literally spend 1 MILLION dollars (actual … Continue reading

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Is That a Dog or a Welcome Mat?

Beethoven. Lassie. Marmaduke. Milo (or Otis). Dogbert. Benji. Odie. Old Yeller. Scooby Doo. Clifford. Cujo. You know those are all dogs. And you can probably pick them out of a doggy lineup, and you can probably tell me what kind … Continue reading

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Tupac the Matchmaker

The following is a story. The story of how i credit the rapper Tupac for getting me and my beautiful wife together. The other day I was at my sister in laws house, helping them move dirt from one pile … Continue reading

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